Ta-Da!

Whelp, it's in there! 

We were excited & anxious early this morning as we put the kids in the car still in their jammies and dropped them off at my friend's house. Awesome friend for waking up before dawn on a Sunday so I can drop my rug-rats off! It was strange being at the clinic on a Sunday. The rest of the building (shared office space) and most of the city is pretty sleepy that early on Sundays. Anyway, we checked-in, got settled in the room and I waited under a cozy blanket.

 

... and Scot was feeling left out...  

The IPs arrived and it was so nice to see their faces! The nurse came in and put an ultrasound wand on my tummy so we could watch the embryo being implanted! Watching it was so surreal - the whole room was silent! Once they pushed it in, they took a picture & handed it to the IM. I turned around and they handed me one too! Yay!

I added the arrow and circle to show you where it is. I apologize for my artistic ability on the computer. :)

The nurse explained some "dos & don'ts" and said I should lay there for 5 minutes, so we chit chatted with the IPs for a bit. I can't imagine how they must feel! I would be so overwhelmed with emotion!

Now at home, I'm taking it easy & spending my day like Phoebe - 

Down to the wire!

Well, I got the appointment time for the day 5 transfer - 8:00am TOMORROW! Woo Hoo! When I was there on Tuesday to get my final check, they had already extracted the donor's eggs and the nurse told me that they got a lot of eggs, which was great, so it looked more likely for a day 5 transfer. I was not really counting on the day 3 transfer. Instructions for the appointment are just to arrive 15 minutes early and come with a half-full bladder. They said it should take no more than 30 minutes.

I have a high tolerance for pain, but boy, am I sore! Up to a few days ago, the injections had been going fine. I had no side effects and they really weren't painful. Then I started progesterone and now I know why anyone who has gone through IVF looks at me with a sympathetic eye when we talk about the shots! The injections leave me sore in the "upper bum" area - sore to the touch like a huge bruise, sore to sit, lay & walk. We alternate sides each day, but they never really heal in-between so it's a constant uncomfort. The medicine creates these "knots" under the skin and the nurse said they can be massaged but it hurts to touch it too much. I'm not trying to complain for sympathy's sake, but just to give anyone who has never gone through it an honest report. :)

I am so excited for tomorrow! Slightly nervous, but mostly excited! I keep thinking how surreal it all is and how it seems like it took forever to get to this point (so much more so for the IPs!) yet I can't believe it's already here! It's strange to actually know I will walk out of the clinic totally changed. My contact (case worker) at the agency has been checking in with me and she said something so beautiful (she has been a surrogate before and is now pregnant for another set of IPs) - she said "I love transfers - they are so beautiful, its the most amazing feeling when those embryos are brought into the room and you know it's life being put into you body." That gave me chills!

The IPs will be at the transfer as well as my amazing husband, Scot. Today is his birthday and I'm sure there's nothing he would rather do on his birthday weekend besides take care of me on light bed rest for a whole day. :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HONEY!! LOVE YOU! :)

Big Week!

Big things are happening here! As we get closer to the Transfer Day there has been a lot more monitoring. I have had several vials of blood taken from my arm to make sure my dosage of the meds are on-track as well as a few trips in the good ol' stirrups to check my uterine lining. Last check was Friday and I go again tomorrow (Tuesday). When I went on Friday the doctor said that anything over "8" was good. Not sure what "8" exactly measures, but I was at 14.4!! Woo hoo!

Look at that cute bootie over the stirrup. :) 

I was told to take my last dose of Lupron last night and to start Progesterone tonight. Progesterone supports the lining of the uterus and is needed to maintain an early pregnancy.

I will probably be more informed tomorrow in detail, but what I have been told so far is that they are extracting the donor's eggs tomorrow and they will be fertilized tomorrow as well. They will do either a day 3 transfer or a day 5 transfer. From what I understand, if the embryos are weak at day 3, they will want to go ahead and transfer them right away... if they are strong, then they will wait 2 more days and transfer 5 days after fertilization. From what I have read, many doctors believe that chances of a successful pregnancy are good for either day. 

And... just for a laugh... I saw this on Pinterest and couldn't resist. :)

"...we are all connected"

I just wanted to share this excerpt from the blog of my surrogacy agency; West Coast Surrogacy (whom I love, by the way). This was posted on the recent anniversary of 9/11 and it really touched me. This describes exactly how I feel about why I am doing what I am doing.

Maybe it's because we've all been through a rough ride together the past few years.  Maybe it is the lingering effects of our shared wound from September 11.  Maybe it is concern for the care of our planet and its citizens.  Whatever the reason, people are helping people more than ever.

David Handschuh/News--From New York Daily News Online

Take gestational surrogacy.  Despite what may be portrayed in popular culture and also tossed around as theory ("Selfish celebs use surrogates to save their own bodies!") we have found in talking to the women who call or write our office, interested to know about being a surrogate, that their motivation is to help someone.  They found it easy and so rewarding to become pregnant and to carry their own children.  They are moved by what they see and hear from other women who can't become pregnant, can't carry a baby to term, and can't create the family they always dreamed of.  And they want to help.

Today, on the anniversary of the tragedy of September 11, we reflect on what we experienced when those towers fell.  We remember the people who lost their lives.  We are grateful for what we have and we practice random acts of kindness to those who have less.  We acknowledge that we are all connected.

One hope I have in taking this journey is that it will teach my children to be empathetic & benevolent. I want them to grow up thinking about others in need, to be charitable, kind & selfless.

For the full blog from West Coast Surrogacy: http://westcoastsurrogacy.blogspot.ca/

It's Like Christmas!

OK, maybe not quite like Christmas... at all, actually...  but I was very excited to get a box in the mail the other day with all of my medication & syringes!! Yes, I know how crazy this makes me sound - but this means that things are finally happening!! It seems like we have forever been signing papers and faxing things back & forth, and now the "fun" stuff can begin! Here it all is:

The reason I have not updated lately is because it has just been boring stuff - mostly legal contracts to process, review & sign. This process took several weeks because the IP's attorney had to draft the contract and have the IPs review, make any necessary changes, then send it to my attorney for me to review, make any necessary changes & sign. The contract included all of the typical things you would expect - the fact that I will not have any parental rights and that I will assist the IPs in obtaining all of their necessary paperwork for legal parental custody of the child. It stated that I give up any rights to make any decisions regarding the child (such as - how to proceed if it tested positive for severe birth defects). It also included financial breakdown (which I will get to at some point) and what I am entitled to as far as life coaching & support. The recent time has also been spent setting up a life insurance policy for me through the surrogacy agency. This only consisted of a 30 minute phone conversation and emailing some necessary health information. Pretty painless.

Speaking of coaching & support, I have also had my first (phone) meeting with the life coach/therapist assigned to me. She was wonderful! I really felt comfortable with her. I will be talking to her at least once a month throughout the whole process and up to 2 months after delivery. She said that she is not only available to coach me through the surrogacy process, but that I can feel free to discuss any other issues with her that I want to. I don't think she knew what she was getting herself into! :) Ha!

So, I will be spending my weekend reading-over the instructions for my shots to start on Sunday 10/30. I have never given myself a shot before, so I am a bit nervous for the first one, although I am sure I will quickly get the hang of it. I will be giving myself a small daily shot of Lupron in the stomach. The larger shots (only a few times throughout the month - Delestrogen & Progesterone) will be in the lower back/upper buttock area and I think Scot will have to help me with those. He is, strangely enough, looking forward to inflicting pain on me with a needle. Thanks, dear. Love ya too. ;)

Telling the Kids

As you can imagine, telling your kids that you will be having a baby that they can't keep to torment as their own little brother or sister can be a bit tricky. We have 3 kids at 3 different ages & comprehension levels.

The oldest (girl) is 12. We told her a few months back when we were still waiting to be matched. We figured she was more likely than the other two to over-hear us talking about it to others and we wanted her to hear it from us first. Since she had already taken those classes we all suffered through in 5th & 6th grades, we knew she'd pick-up on the science behind it all. She quickly grasped the concept and immediately related it to an episode of Modern Family. Can't we all relate to Modern Family at one point or another? Awesome! We checked back with her a few times after to see if she had any other questions. I also talked to her about this blog and she has read parts of it. She asks periodically what the latest news is and when we expect to be "pregnant". She seems excited!

The next one down the line (girl) just turned 6. I broached the subject with her by asking what she would think if Mommy helped another Mommy who had a broken tummy by giving that mommy's baby a cozy home until it was born. She was intrigued and said that yes, that would be pretty cool. She asked how the baby would get into my tummy. (Yikes!) I told her that doctors are super smart and have very special tools to do that. After I told her that we found the couple that we are going to help, she was very excited and was very eager to see their photo. Yay!

The youngest (boy) is 3 and a half. If we brought it up to him now, it would go right over his head. We plan to keep him in the "loop" and talk to him periodically as my belly grows. Someone I spoke to at the Fertility Center told me a cute little analogy to use; "If we saw someone in the grocery store parking lot who had a broken arm, we would help them by carrying their groceries... but this doesn't mean that we'd keep the groceries we carried for them, because they are still theirs." - So cute, I love it!

Now that the kids are on-board, in other news - I have just finished my 1st month of birth control pills and now that the egg donor has been screened (last week), I am assuming she passed and will be getting her cycle in-sync with mine. The fertility center sent me my proposed calendar for all of the meds, blood draws, transfer date, etc. It's pretty crazy. I will have to scan and post below. Looks like we will be starting end of September/early October with meds and a potential transfer date at the end of October!

- Valentine

Can't Say No to Ice Cream

We met the IPs!!

It was 2 weeks ago (Scot and I have been on vacation this week - sorry this post is a bit delayed) but the day came around that we had briefly talked about meeting for the first time if all the tests went well. Since everything was cleared, the agency sent me all of the IP's contact info and sent them the same for me. The IF (Intended Father) emailed me shortly after, worried that he had not made any reservations anywhere. I suggested we do something simple like meet for dessert or ice cream. I thought it would be less pressure than a long dinner for our first meeting... He said he can't say no to ice cream! I couldn't agree more!

San Francisco is known for some darn good ice cream, so we had some options. We were hoping for one that might have a small table to sit and chat. We decided on Bi-Rite Creamery in the Mission District. Parking was a challenge, but we found something a few blocks away and walked down 18th street with butterflies swirling around my stomach. Mostly excited and a bit nervous, we were first to arrive. As we were sitting out front to wait for them, they pulled up and the IM (Intended Mother) hopped out of their car so he could park. Once we were all together, my nerves quickly melted away as I realized how warm and easygoing they were! Conversation came easy and it seemed like we were all excited to get to know one another. We chit-chatted in the long line for our ice cream and then luckily found a cozy table to talk more. We covered all of the basic "where are you from?", "how many siblings do you have?", etc... we swapped stories of our journeys up to this point and even shared some similar frustrations with other surrogacy agencies we had each dealt with prior to finding the one we were matched through. We came to the conclusion that this must have been "meant to be" - and that is exactly what I had been hoping for all along. I knew the right couple would come along at the right time. Funny how things happen that way.

So excited to get this process rolling. They will be using an egg donor, so once they confirm that (last I heard was that they had selected one but it was not finalized), then the donor and I will need to get our cycles in sync using birth control pills. I have been told that the pills, along with all of the other medication I will need to take, will be sent to me. I love getting packages!! :)